I will simply say "ditto" to so much that has already been shared by so many from the heart. What I would like to leave you with is the observation that your own sharing from the heart has evoked such an outpouring from your followers. We already know you as a wise woman from your vast studies of myth, ancient cultures, sky patterns, from which you help us frame and experience the passing of the seasons. But it is when you share from your deepest personal experiences that you truly touch our souls. Thank you for your healing presence in the world, Jan. You are such a blessing.
I was thinking of you as I prepared to step into my office and open to the day here. I literally just sat down when I saw this message from you arrive to me. Moments earlier, as I was preparing, I thought about something I had read from a dear gay friend of mine, something he wrote to me about me a year and 16 days before he died on my dead brother's birthday (2013). I didn't know he was dying. Did he? I don't think so. Did my brother sum up my life 2.5 months before he died (1993)? My response at that moment was, "Steven, I'm not dead yet." The architect, in the beginning, was someone I counted every hour with because I knew they were limited. Funny little surprises in life, how this has been the longest, most all-encompassing connection in my life, in all the areas that mean the most to me. He is very talented, but not in it at all for the money or prestige, but literally, because it challenges and thrills him, this unrestricted creative surge and expression! It's a joy to watch it unfold. Both the art and the permission it gives to live.
Thank you Jan for being so honest. It amazes me that someone as talented an artist as you faces criticism. I fight with self doubt all the time and any confidence I do gain can be so easily shattered. Doing what has meaning for you is what matters, not what people say about it. And it is so important to remember to keep those things in our lives. I get so much pleasure from doing nature journaling and yet that has taken the back seat to so many other commitments. This has given me the inspiration to pick up my journal again. Thank you as always!!
Hi Gail, it always amazes me how we, myself included can allow the things that bring us the most joy to slip to the bottom of the priority list. Fortunately, we can always pick up the thread and pull it forward and make it an important part of our daily design. I hope you get back into the routine of nature sketching. I bet you goats would make wonderful models!
Yes. Yes. Yes. You've heard the whole, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach P.E." I agree with your theory about creating art, and how the rush to monetize it, make it valuable, win the ribbons, etc damages art and the artist. It's the joy of expression, the building of familiarity and capability that is the gift. In our culture, people get off criticizing others. Others' opinions shouldn't matter. The only thing that matters is that each person finds their joy and expresses it. Comparison does steal the joy. Have you heard about Michaelina Wautier (1614–1689), a painter from Brussels all but forgotten until the recent rediscovery of her work? https://www.mfa.org/gallery/michaelina-wautier-and-the-five-senses You'll love the story about her and her work. I was always compared to others. The night I won the h.s. Hall of Fame Award, was so empty. I have a long-term lover that was an architect, has always loved to sketch and paint, and is now completely free to develop his art. I can't wait to share the link to this wondrous piece you created today! Thank you for your path!
This is such a pervasive attitude/problem to overcome. Generally the word "amateur" is sneered at. An amateur is not a professional or an expert, therefore they are dismissed as pathetic wannabes. Yet to be an amateur in the truest and noblest sense of the word is to engage in something because of your deep love and reverence for it, unpolluted by the concerns of profit or prestige. There is something enormously freeing about being an amateur, a lover of ....(fill in the blank with your passion). Love that you are passing this on to your much loved architect and supporting the creative flame in their life.
I so loved this!!! Not to mention I knew you were a really good artist, but I seriously had no clue in regards to the caliber of artist you are!!!! WOW! I share your love of creating with pens and pencils... paints... whatever I can. Thank you once again for enriching my life with your words. :)
Ha! I don’t often talk about my life as an artist, it’s like a whole other existence from my past. I did enjoy it while I was in it but now using art in service to something higher, in service to healing and helping, both myself and others is like a whole other level. Spirit calls and leads us upwards.
Your art style is fabulous, so vibrant! It surprises me that anyone would criticize it. I’ve only just started getting into art, and I know I stayed away from it for so long because I was afraid of not being good enough or living up to my own high expectations. I really regret listening to that voice because I’ve been having so much fun painting. Being creative produces such a joyful feeling of well-being, and when people deny themselves that impulse, they are essentially cutting themselves off from life. Art is so healing and I hope that more people who are suffering will turn to that as a form of therapy.
Daisy Anne I’m so happy to hear that you are fearlessly making art. That is a wonderful claiming of a part of you that has always been there and now has an opportunity to breathe, expand and grow. Bravo!
Jan, thank you so much for this reflection! I have been trying for years now to put a name to the brick wall which prevents me from expressing my creativity. After reading your reflection I saw it: craving recognition. Those criticisms and off hand comments, especially from loved ones are daggers in the soul. I commit today to release my desire for recognition and acceptance and allow the spirit in me the freedom of full, spontaneous expression.
Ann what a powerful revelation and intention. I fully support you in recognizing, accepting and allowing the creative spirit full freedom for spontaneous expression. Embrace your artist-self with love and confidence.
I loved this. Yes, to your question I and many face self doubt and long more than ever to be authentic. When I left the idea of having to produce realistic paintings and got more and more into art journaling my creative self started to hum. I was working from that place of authenticity for me. I am a chaplain and a world religion teacher. I have learned the world is ablaze with wisdom everywhere. Now I use my art for cancer patients, women at shelters and refugees. It's so much less about perfection but more about coaxing the authenticity of each beloved out into the light. My art now is really about sharing who I am at the core. However, journeying through self doubt, the comparison by others, judgement has very much been the tool that awakened me into my own authentic path.
"the world is ablaze with wisdom everywhere" Oh my goodness, I love this insight! Art-making is a form of healing, I firmly believe that. I often think that the competitive side that breeds self-doubt, and perfectionism is its shadow. Thank you for the amazing work you do.
Oh my goodness! This really came home to me! I remember an art show/ competition that I entered way back. I walked in, saw my first place ribbon among others and thought to myself that there had to be more to creating art than this. That’s when I started teaching art. I found it fulfilling and satisfying to be able to share with beginner artists what I had learned over time. I taught private lessons and taught in the classroom.
I took your nature journaling classes online! It opened a new door for me and I now have the pleasure of teaching it to student Master Naturalists and children! No, I don’t get paid! I teach for free and have never been happier sharing my art! Thank you Jan! I don’t think I’v thanked you before now but accept my thanks with the love and gratitude with it!
There is something empty about "blue ribbons" isn't there? Often the message they convey is one that strokes the ego rather than lighting up the soul. Teaching others how to make art is often to participate in fulfilling a life long dream and that is an incredible honor. Art lifts humanity and the more people making art and healing inside because of it the better!
Jan, I so needed to read this today. I have always struggled with “not being good enough “, not having gone to art school. But the joy of creating, being lost in the moment is so healing. We must not let other people tear us down and be true to ourselves and what makes us happy. Thank you
We are our own worst critics, it doesn’t help that others make comments on your work without realising that’s actually how you draw! I paint, though by my own admission, not very well, but I’m happy enough. Recently I received my first ever compliment, and that was from another artist. It’s amazing how you can be lifted by nice people, and you feel so awful when someone shares their opinion. At the end of the day, as you say, we are doing it for the joy of creating. I often say “comparison is the thief of joy “ I’ve no idea who said it originally, lol. Your pages look joyful, doing it for yourself is always the best thing!
“Comparison is the thief of joy” that’s brilliant. I often wonder why we have professional critics, art critics, movie critics, book critics. It’s as if we are taught to not trust our own experiences. Self-doubt extends to the viewer too. We can feel foolish for liking a movie the critics panned, and then our joy in it is gone. I sometimes wonder if the power to create is so extraordinary, so “god-like” that we are unsure if we are wielding it correctly and thus look to “experts” or “others” to validate what we do. Creating is a kind of magic and it’s very powerful, yet nearly universally in our culture there are unhealthy attitudes around it. Over many years I’ve come to understand that using the creative process therapeutically for healing and greater self-discovery is one of its highest purposes. I hope you keep painting for the sheer joy of self-expression.
I will simply say "ditto" to so much that has already been shared by so many from the heart. What I would like to leave you with is the observation that your own sharing from the heart has evoked such an outpouring from your followers. We already know you as a wise woman from your vast studies of myth, ancient cultures, sky patterns, from which you help us frame and experience the passing of the seasons. But it is when you share from your deepest personal experiences that you truly touch our souls. Thank you for your healing presence in the world, Jan. You are such a blessing.
Thank you for affirming the power of vulnerability and sharing from the heart. 🙏
I was thinking of you as I prepared to step into my office and open to the day here. I literally just sat down when I saw this message from you arrive to me. Moments earlier, as I was preparing, I thought about something I had read from a dear gay friend of mine, something he wrote to me about me a year and 16 days before he died on my dead brother's birthday (2013). I didn't know he was dying. Did he? I don't think so. Did my brother sum up my life 2.5 months before he died (1993)? My response at that moment was, "Steven, I'm not dead yet." The architect, in the beginning, was someone I counted every hour with because I knew they were limited. Funny little surprises in life, how this has been the longest, most all-encompassing connection in my life, in all the areas that mean the most to me. He is very talented, but not in it at all for the money or prestige, but literally, because it challenges and thrills him, this unrestricted creative surge and expression! It's a joy to watch it unfold. Both the art and the permission it gives to live.
Thank you Jan for being so honest. It amazes me that someone as talented an artist as you faces criticism. I fight with self doubt all the time and any confidence I do gain can be so easily shattered. Doing what has meaning for you is what matters, not what people say about it. And it is so important to remember to keep those things in our lives. I get so much pleasure from doing nature journaling and yet that has taken the back seat to so many other commitments. This has given me the inspiration to pick up my journal again. Thank you as always!!
Hi Gail, it always amazes me how we, myself included can allow the things that bring us the most joy to slip to the bottom of the priority list. Fortunately, we can always pick up the thread and pull it forward and make it an important part of our daily design. I hope you get back into the routine of nature sketching. I bet you goats would make wonderful models!
Yes. Yes. Yes. You've heard the whole, "Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't teach, teach P.E." I agree with your theory about creating art, and how the rush to monetize it, make it valuable, win the ribbons, etc damages art and the artist. It's the joy of expression, the building of familiarity and capability that is the gift. In our culture, people get off criticizing others. Others' opinions shouldn't matter. The only thing that matters is that each person finds their joy and expresses it. Comparison does steal the joy. Have you heard about Michaelina Wautier (1614–1689), a painter from Brussels all but forgotten until the recent rediscovery of her work? https://www.mfa.org/gallery/michaelina-wautier-and-the-five-senses You'll love the story about her and her work. I was always compared to others. The night I won the h.s. Hall of Fame Award, was so empty. I have a long-term lover that was an architect, has always loved to sketch and paint, and is now completely free to develop his art. I can't wait to share the link to this wondrous piece you created today! Thank you for your path!
This is such a pervasive attitude/problem to overcome. Generally the word "amateur" is sneered at. An amateur is not a professional or an expert, therefore they are dismissed as pathetic wannabes. Yet to be an amateur in the truest and noblest sense of the word is to engage in something because of your deep love and reverence for it, unpolluted by the concerns of profit or prestige. There is something enormously freeing about being an amateur, a lover of ....(fill in the blank with your passion). Love that you are passing this on to your much loved architect and supporting the creative flame in their life.
I so loved this!!! Not to mention I knew you were a really good artist, but I seriously had no clue in regards to the caliber of artist you are!!!! WOW! I share your love of creating with pens and pencils... paints... whatever I can. Thank you once again for enriching my life with your words. :)
Ha! I don’t often talk about my life as an artist, it’s like a whole other existence from my past. I did enjoy it while I was in it but now using art in service to something higher, in service to healing and helping, both myself and others is like a whole other level. Spirit calls and leads us upwards.
Your art style is fabulous, so vibrant! It surprises me that anyone would criticize it. I’ve only just started getting into art, and I know I stayed away from it for so long because I was afraid of not being good enough or living up to my own high expectations. I really regret listening to that voice because I’ve been having so much fun painting. Being creative produces such a joyful feeling of well-being, and when people deny themselves that impulse, they are essentially cutting themselves off from life. Art is so healing and I hope that more people who are suffering will turn to that as a form of therapy.
Daisy Anne I’m so happy to hear that you are fearlessly making art. That is a wonderful claiming of a part of you that has always been there and now has an opportunity to breathe, expand and grow. Bravo!
Jan, thank you so much for this reflection! I have been trying for years now to put a name to the brick wall which prevents me from expressing my creativity. After reading your reflection I saw it: craving recognition. Those criticisms and off hand comments, especially from loved ones are daggers in the soul. I commit today to release my desire for recognition and acceptance and allow the spirit in me the freedom of full, spontaneous expression.
Ann what a powerful revelation and intention. I fully support you in recognizing, accepting and allowing the creative spirit full freedom for spontaneous expression. Embrace your artist-self with love and confidence.
Jan,
I loved this. Yes, to your question I and many face self doubt and long more than ever to be authentic. When I left the idea of having to produce realistic paintings and got more and more into art journaling my creative self started to hum. I was working from that place of authenticity for me. I am a chaplain and a world religion teacher. I have learned the world is ablaze with wisdom everywhere. Now I use my art for cancer patients, women at shelters and refugees. It's so much less about perfection but more about coaxing the authenticity of each beloved out into the light. My art now is really about sharing who I am at the core. However, journeying through self doubt, the comparison by others, judgement has very much been the tool that awakened me into my own authentic path.
"the world is ablaze with wisdom everywhere" Oh my goodness, I love this insight! Art-making is a form of healing, I firmly believe that. I often think that the competitive side that breeds self-doubt, and perfectionism is its shadow. Thank you for the amazing work you do.
Oh my goodness! This really came home to me! I remember an art show/ competition that I entered way back. I walked in, saw my first place ribbon among others and thought to myself that there had to be more to creating art than this. That’s when I started teaching art. I found it fulfilling and satisfying to be able to share with beginner artists what I had learned over time. I taught private lessons and taught in the classroom.
I took your nature journaling classes online! It opened a new door for me and I now have the pleasure of teaching it to student Master Naturalists and children! No, I don’t get paid! I teach for free and have never been happier sharing my art! Thank you Jan! I don’t think I’v thanked you before now but accept my thanks with the love and gratitude with it!
There is something empty about "blue ribbons" isn't there? Often the message they convey is one that strokes the ego rather than lighting up the soul. Teaching others how to make art is often to participate in fulfilling a life long dream and that is an incredible honor. Art lifts humanity and the more people making art and healing inside because of it the better!
Jan, I so needed to read this today. I have always struggled with “not being good enough “, not having gone to art school. But the joy of creating, being lost in the moment is so healing. We must not let other people tear us down and be true to ourselves and what makes us happy. Thank you
Being “lost in the moment” in that other state of mind or place is the true healing gift that creating gives us mere mortals.
We are our own worst critics, it doesn’t help that others make comments on your work without realising that’s actually how you draw! I paint, though by my own admission, not very well, but I’m happy enough. Recently I received my first ever compliment, and that was from another artist. It’s amazing how you can be lifted by nice people, and you feel so awful when someone shares their opinion. At the end of the day, as you say, we are doing it for the joy of creating. I often say “comparison is the thief of joy “ I’ve no idea who said it originally, lol. Your pages look joyful, doing it for yourself is always the best thing!
“Comparison is the thief of joy” that’s brilliant. I often wonder why we have professional critics, art critics, movie critics, book critics. It’s as if we are taught to not trust our own experiences. Self-doubt extends to the viewer too. We can feel foolish for liking a movie the critics panned, and then our joy in it is gone. I sometimes wonder if the power to create is so extraordinary, so “god-like” that we are unsure if we are wielding it correctly and thus look to “experts” or “others” to validate what we do. Creating is a kind of magic and it’s very powerful, yet nearly universally in our culture there are unhealthy attitudes around it. Over many years I’ve come to understand that using the creative process therapeutically for healing and greater self-discovery is one of its highest purposes. I hope you keep painting for the sheer joy of self-expression.